Life and Living It

So nice to be back at my blog, Little Bits.  Life is made up of perpetual little bits and when strung all together they define us. Everything that happens in life is important when it happens to you, little or big. There have been an inordinate number of slogans created to minimize bad things like suck it up or shit happens or it is what it is.  I get it, don't sweat the small stuff.  Simply put, it isn't all small and lots of stuff has occurred in my life.  2012 has been eventful so far.

Let's start back in January.  On the 11th I celebrated 20 years of sobriety.  That decision was the single most important in my life.  I have a life because of it.  A few months later, I was able to enjoy 20 years of being a non-smoker.  I am grateful.

In April, on the morning after Easter Sunday I was invited to join the staff at a landfill free waste removal company owned in part by my brother.  This job could not have come at a better time.  I am able to work from home.  My hours are flexible.  The pay is good.  My responsibilities are increasing.  It is so cool that I am working with my brother.  I have always adored him and  now I am getting the chance to be closer to him and it makes me smile.  Not to mention I am doing something brand new half way into my life!  How fortunate I feel.  

In May, my good friend moved a mile or so away.  You see, when she moved she stopped being my next door neighbor.  That was hard for me.  Her house was one where my whole family was loved and welcomed and I knew I would miss that most.  While my family members each have friendships in our neighborhood with various folks, in her home we all had a place. Our kids grew up together from babies in our adjoining back yards where we enjoyed 10 years of impromptu and planned gatherings sharing coffee and catching lightning bugs.  Our husbands would get together and play tennis on summer nights.  When we were snowed in or lost power our families ate Chinese and puzzled by candlelight.  It's priceless to have this kind of a neighbor and friend.  When I learned her family was moving, I cried.  I had nightmares.  I cried in the shower.  (I don't know about you, but shower crying is reserved for the really sad stuff.)

So began the summer with me working from home and my kids at home, too.  The one thing I learned was  that next summer will most certainly be different...C-A-M-P! 

Early in the summer, I got a call from a friend I've known nearly all of my life telling me she had breast cancer.  She is my first friend to get this diagnosis and I was stunned. She was stoic, but of course I cried on the phone.  She continues to amaze me with her strength and if anyone can kick cancer's ass, it's her.  

Throughout the end of last school year, it was becoming apparent that we needed to talk to my son about his having autism.  I cried during that conversation.  It was short and upbeat and he seemed to handle it well.  Since then, we've spoken about it a few times and the conversations are all good and some are more difficult than others.  He has really come into his own this past year and I love him for all I'm worth.

My younger son may have some medical issues that are minor and we have consulted with his pediatrician. After having one child diagnosed with Autism, I get really frightened at the prospect of dealing with anything more than a cold. On the positive side, he is happy, a talented artist and he loves his momma!  He and his brother are fast friends.  All things considered, we are lucky.  And I must say that I'm glad 8 year old boys still like to snuggle!

I lost two beloved pets this year, a cat, Lucy and a sweet little dog named Sushi.  They were the last of my single pets, the last ties to my life as a single person.  Both lived long, happy lives.  I was with both of them when they passed.  Lucy at the vet's office and Sushi at home.  My poor babies!  My creatures are part of my family and I am grieving for them and little for my single life, too.  

Hurricane Sandy left my family unscathed, but battered my beloved Jersey Shore.  So much loss.  I have helped in some small ways and feel like I should do more for those affected.  Every time I see the photo of the roller coaster on the Seaside, NJ Boardwalk mangled and laying in the ocean it ignites a feeling of sickening dread.  I think of our family home in Cape May Point, NJ and the realization that we could lose our home in another storm is horrifying.

In the past couple of weeks, I have enjoyed a few cups of coffee and tea with my friend in her new home. (Yes, I was talking to her. She only just moved in!)  Strangely enough, I feel the same way in that house as I did when she lived next door.  Go figure!  Another lesson learned.

What I have come to understand is that I seem to cry a lot and that this is life.  It is not happening to me, it is happening inside me, all around me and to all of us all the time.  2012 isn't over yet and I am feeling that familiar child-like giddiness at the approaching holiday season.  I am looking forward to all that will be enjoyed and challenged and experienced, every little bit of it!

A Moving Message

For Ivy


Once upon a time in a far away land, there lived a beautiful, young girl named Princess Dawn.  She resided in a modest brick castle with red shutters.  Her loyal subjects included Lady Rachel Roundbelly Gatecrasher of Labrador, The Honorable Miss Sushi of Japan, Sir Benjamin Franklin Ferret, Mr. Bad Harold the Black Cat and Lady Lucy of Tortie.  Princess Dawn's castle was filled with love.

She enjoyed a life of luxury.  Princess Dawn had lots of money, a career, a sportscar, and time for quiet cups of Earl Grey Tea.  She loved to nap in the afternoon before partaking in the local night life activities. Her life was comfortable and happy.

Then, one day, the evil Lord Jeff appeared and took Princess Dawn from her castle on his Great White Mustang.  He promised the Princess a beautiful life, but she was wary of the rogue.  He moved her to Dublin where the smell of the garage nauseated her.  He must have cast a spell on Rachel, for soon after she disappeared.  Then he announced, "You shall bear me sons!".  Soon Evan and Reid joined the family and the boys followed in their father's footsteps, robbing Princess Dawn of her youth, beauty, wealth, afternoon naps and quiet cups of Earl Grey tea.

The sad Princess looked at her life and longed for her little brick castle.  She missed Rachel Roundbelly Gatecrasher everyday.  She wondered if she would ever be herself again.  Then, something magical started to happen.  She looked into the eyes of her two sons and felt an unimaginable love in her heart.   Lord Jeff worked hard every day to keep the Castle Dublin warm and filled with good food.

Princess Dawn met Princess Christie who lived in the castle next.  She, too, had a lord (John) to please and had borne him children.  The Princesses enjoyed days together watching the children play.  The daughter of the other lord and princess was named Ivy.  Her brother was named Jude. At first, Princess Dawn offered little Ivy some coffee, but that made her cry.  Eventually, Princess Dawn came to realize that the girl preferred tea.  How lovely!

After young Jude visited many times, declaring his ever present hunger, the families decided they needed more food so a common garden was planned.  Amid grumblings of the lords they prepared the earth that was filled with shale and they planted seeds.  The princesses doubted the seeds would grow, but they did.  For many seasons, there were harvests aplenty and even the lords were grateful.  Fall feasts were scheduled for the families to enjoy the fruits and vegetables of their labor.  Beautiful and delicious dishes of purple, yellow, green, orange and red produce were prepared and served.  

On summer nights, the royal families would catch fireflies and enjoy beverages and snacks.  Miss Ivy and Princess Dawn found they shared a love of singing and dancing.  They even made up their own songs about old ladies swallowing children and cats.  They would entertain the others by teaching them the lyrics and having a sing-along.  Princess Dawn enjoyed coiffing Ivy's hair and applying big-girl makeup so she could watch Lord John become fretful.

Princess Dawn longed for her former castle less and less.  She was fulfilled and felt great joy for her circumstances including her friendship with Princess Christie's family.  They were special. Each loved the children of the other and spent many fun times together.  Princess Christie delighted in transporting the children to their lessons in her royal robes, often to the chagrin of young Evan.  Young Reid would appear on the doorstep of Princess Christie bearing gifts. Even the lords would socialize, playing tennis or games of cards.  Many great kindnesses were exchanged and the families grew close.

Alas, all things must change and it was to pass that the family of Lord John and Princess Christie were building a new castle and would no longer live next door to Lord Jeff and Princess Dawn. Despite objections and the threat of stoning, Lord John continued with his plan to take his family away.  It was spring and it was time to prepare the common garden.  At first, Princess Dawn couldn't imagine working the earth alone.  Then, Princess Dawn thought of all that had grown in the garden and beyond. She realized that now, her Dublin castle was what she loved, even more than her little brick castle with the red shutters.  It had brought her a family, loyal pets and new friends.  It was home. It needed its garden.

And so it would be for Miss Ivy. Her new castle would be built and she would have new adventures and more fun times.  She would continue to enjoy the company of Princess Dawn's family for the friendship forged by their families was the forever kind.  She would find, like Princess Dawn, that home is in your heart.  And fortunately for Lord John, their new castle is close by.      

The End.